What do I have to do?
07 July 2008 @ 23:19 ; 0 CommentsI got you babe.
Went out with one of my closest polytechnic girlfriends, S. Back then, people assumed a lot about us- mostly of the facts that a guy, a girl, very close, most of the time can be seen together... you know, that presumption. That old thing. We're just friends, folks. Fortunately.
So yes, it was a spontaneous outing. I asked her out in the middle of the day, she replied a couple of hours later, and bam! We were meeting up and hanging out. It was all nice, actually. Played catch up- exchanging tales about our lives, and me being my usual self, peppering the conversation with doses of humor and insanity. Just like old times eh, S. Just like old times.
But then there was a catch that even I was caught off-guard. I was unaware really until I was told of the sudden detour that we were forced to make in the midst of our quality time together. Apparently her somewhat-boyfriend-but-not-quite decided to join us in our Monday escapade. Totally off-guard, right? Like, hello. I did not sign up to be the third wheel in this outing. The gooseberry, strawberry, raspberry, blueberry, blackberry dan sendirian berhad.
Why do friends inflict the worse on their friends? Particularly involving their significant other. They want to spend time with their friends, but at the same time they want to spend time with their partners too. And they want their two loves to meet each other, acknowledge, make some talk, find some common ground... generally forcing them to like each other in the first meeting. What do you expect, really? As friends, we can't really hurt them. But then, there is a limit to our tolerance too, you know. As much as we would love to meet your other half, we do not want to be relegated as the third party.
That's what happened between S, her guy and myself. For the entire time the three of us were together she had to be in the middle, and for the most part S and me were communicating in whispers and knowing looks, much like schoolgirls sharing a devious secret. If you ask me, I don't feel bad at all. I mean, c'mon. I don't even know the guy that well, and if you expect me to be all friendly at the first meeting then that wouldn't happen so fast. Like boiling water, I take some time to warm up to new individuals. So unlike my personality, right? Hmmm.
Lest you think I am annoyed at S about that situation, which I was, I'm not totally blaming S. And it's not like this has happened to only me. We understand the predicament, and as much as we truly want to welcome the love of your life into our circle, it does take time too. It's okay if it's for a general outing, where the turnout is more than three. At least when you want some couple time, we have other people to entertain us. But then most of the time that's not really the case. It's already awkward enough the situation that you can slice through it with a cold knife. And what happens when the couple wants to have some quiet time in the midst of it all? You end up either trying not to look, trying to look away, or not even knowing where to look. Again, begs the saying- awkward much?
Despite all that, somehow I know how these people think. They would introduce their boyfriends/girlfriends to someone they really trust and care for first, to seek acceptance, permission, and the like. If all goes well, then slowly their mutual circle of friends get to meet the other half as well. It's fine if you want to do it that way, but please, the least you could do is inform us in advance of your plans. That way we can come prepared with plastic smiles, various topics of conversations and body language that doesn't scream "AWKWARD!" Okok, only kidding about the plastic smiles bit.
Right so I'm rambling. I bet you are only waiting for the gold here- what do I think of the guy? Right? RIGHT? Rightttt. Well I do have my opinions, but it's not like I am going to lambast the dude to all my readers (all the zero comments don't fool me) out there. I may be a bitch, but I value privacy and respect. (Ask me instead if you do happen to meet me and are dying to find out. Opinions sound better with a bitchy tone instead of a bitchy read.)
