Gotta move on.
11 July 2008 @ 18:14 ; 0 CommentsIt has been over a month since I was last employed. One month... that is a bloody long time, isn't it. And within that one month you lot would probably know that my main priorities are eating, sleeping, and being up at the wee hours of the night. Basically being nocturnal. Right now, somehow, I am feeling the pressures of it all. Not necessarily because the routine and boredom has slowly started to swell. No, it's mostly due to the fact that somehow I feel my parents are breathing down my neck, expecting me to pick myself up and go out there and find a job.
To be honest, it's not like I do not intend to find a job. My original plans upon ORDing from the army has been seriously dashed- there I was, hoping to be admitted into a good university, earn my degree, and then find a job that is suitable for me. Instead all of that got run down by an eighteen wheeler and I am forced to revert to my back-up plan which, in essence, still hasn't quite gel with me today.
It's not that I am resenting the fact that I have to find a job so soon- I know that eventually, I have to go into the workforce and subject myself to the horrors and tortures of being a work slave, working the daily shift of nine to five, enduring the increasingly cramped public transport, getting into the mundane routines of life once again. Okay, I am absolutely lying earlier- I actually am resenting and resisting that fact. I couldn't really fathom why these tertiary educational institutes do not want me. Is it because my results were extremely bad? They can't blame it on the increasing number of students applying for school, since it looks like most of them were able to get in. So, it all comes down to me.
I guess these increasing pressures to perform is mainly attributed to my parents. They may not show it, but I know that deep down, like all the clichés we have been subjected to, they "just want the best for their children", even if that means doing things that perhaps may not go down well with their broods and may even draw a wedge between them.
Earlier today I was reading our one and only tabloid trash when my sister came into the room and flipped to the classified ads, before stopping at one particular job ad and said that The Old Man "recommends" me the job. And guess what? It's a trainee officer vocation with SATS. Like, hello! I did not earn my diploma just to work as a trainee officer. I mean, no offence to those who hold that position but seriously, why should I waste my education qualification on something as menial as that? When I know that there are better jobs out there for me that I can use both my skills and what I have learned to greater effect? I felt so insulted. (Hence the blogging.) And if that was not bad enough, there were a couple of occasions whereby The Mom wanted me to apply for jobs in the administrative line. Lagi worse, I tell you.
It's not wrong that I have my own interests and ideas on what kind of job(s) I would want to go for, right? We all have opinions and needs and wants, and it's only fair that other people respect that, whatever it may be. So why do parents think that they can easily waltz into our lives, come up with insane decisions that they think are best for us, when they haven't even consulted us in the first place? This is one serious situation that is the increasing cause of communication breakdowns between the older generations and ourselves. And this is not the first time I have to stand my ground against my parents based on decisions either side made. I mean, I am glad that for the most part, they leave my sister and me alone to fend for ourselves and work things out and come out with our life choices, but it's just that it feels like some of the things that they want us to do are perhaps things that they feel are "best" for us or, dare I say it, things that they were not able to do and hence, they are making us do instead.
I am not saying my parents - or all parents, for that matter, since I seem to be implicating them - are unreasonable. It's just that perhaps it would be best if everyone sat themselves down and talk things through before coming to a consensus. And it would be better if the decisions made were made solely by the party that is going through the predicament, be it good or bad. I guess my parents earn a bad rep for that.
As for me, I am looking into jobs that I have a serious interest in. What kind of jobs are they? Well, someone once posed me that same question. The jobs that I would like to get into are those that challenge me. Okay, so that means that most of the jobs in Singapore are not applicable to me but it's fine, really. The Mom said to wait it out, pray and hope for the best. So that's what I am diligently telling myself to do. All while sending out curriculum vitaes after curriculum vitaes. Here's hoping for the best. And for that one job that will stimulate me. And not in that sense. Although an office romance would be a wonderful plus.
